I'm tired!

Let me start by saying that I LOVE my son. In my eyes he is the best thing that I have ever done, having JJ in my life and intertwining our lives forever was the second best.

Felix is now 2 years old, he runs and does everything at super speed. Gone are the days where we could sit in one spot and just nurse all day! I won't lie and tell you that the good old days were great and that I loved them because they came with their own brand of headaches but I do sometimes long for them...

I went to the park the other day with JJ and Felix in tow to try and connect with other Moms from the Sanctuary (the midwifery practice that we used when I was pregnant with Felix). The group at the park was the toddler group so I fully expected to find children Felix's age and was quite puzzled to find much younger children.

That is when I noticed that even with the few months difference between them, a two year old is way more demanding than a 14 month old. The little ones were only starting to walk and were still in the early stages of that crazy time of their short lives and here goes Felix whizzing by them at what must have seemed to the other Moms there like a million miles an hour!

Now I had expected a group where we could commiserate about the crazy things our kids had put us threw instead here I was hearing about what Junior likes to eat, clearly I was in the wrong place but I stayed and tried to chat with the other ladies but at the end of the day their reality and mine were a million miles apart.

So since I wasn't able to vent I am going to do it here.

Being a Mom SUCKS! I mean... it mostly rocks but some days I just want to lock myself in a room, any room (and yes the bathroom will do!) and just do something for me and only for me. Of late I find that my workout at the end of the day is my ONLY alone time. If I can be honest some days (and this is turning into most days of late) I just have no patience for bopping around and punching the air and pretending like I want to do my x seconds of plank or my HIIT class! I just want to take a nap! Yup! Hell I would settle for taking a poo uninterrupted!

My life right now consists of taking care of a child who constantly says "NO!!!" and "Mommy what's going on?" or "Mommy whatcha doing?", who thinks that doing the exact opposite of what is asked of him is his life's mission and who if left unchecked would spend most of his time out of time out and drawing all over the walls!

I love spending time with him but when napping becomes a daily battle and everything is challenged I just get really tired! (A kingdom for a nap!)

I don't drink coffee (or if I do it's decaf ) or liquor but at the rate things are going I think I am going to start on both!